


My Heart Goes Out With This One

by Fandom_Lover101



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Cute, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Male My Unit | Byleth, Mental Health Issues, Sharing a Bed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-09
Updated: 2020-03-09
Packaged: 2021-02-28 01:48:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,579
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22995694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fandom_Lover101/pseuds/Fandom_Lover101
Summary: Dimitri was not having a very nice day.~"I'll think of you every moment you're gone."~Dimitri was not having a great week.~"It's your fault, you know."~Dimitri was not having a good month.~"YOU AREN'T EVEN REAL!"~
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/My Unit | Byleth
Comments: 1
Kudos: 23





	My Heart Goes Out With This One

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pangendee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pangendee/gifts).



> Another fic of a fandom I'm not in! If anything is inaccurate or something, just lemme know and I'll fix it to the best of my abilities.
> 
> Small Trigger Warning!   
> Dimitri has hallucinations of dead loved ones and jas bad mental health  
>  It'll be more detailed in end notes, but those with have spoilers. 
> 
> Also, the title is a line from s3 ep3 of The Dragon Prince. 
> 
> Anyways, Enjoy Loves!

Dimitri was not having a very nice day. You could tell because he was curled up in the corner of his bed and his nightstand, hugging his legs and pressing his face to his knees to hide the waterfall of tears from the world, including himself.

Dimitri was not having a great week. You could tell because he has been jumping at little things that you would never expect him to jump at and talking to people who weren't there, and never would be there ever again. 

Dimitri was not having a good month. You could tell because he was pushing himself to the max and he could feel himself slipping into a downward spiral, yet when his friends showed concern for his well being, he simply brushed them off and started distancing himself into isolation.

But to understand the full story, we need to go back further. To about 5 and a half weeks ago.

Dimitri was having a perfect day. Earlier in the day, after a long, tough, and very sweaty sparring session, he had confessed to Byleth that he thought of the professor as more than a friend. Surprisingly enough, Byleth had also confessed that these feelings were mutual. Dimitri was ecstatic and he quickly stooped down to press his smiling lips to Byleth's cheek. Byleth, ever known for his blank expressions, smiled softly up at his new love. 

Now, the two boyfriends were spending their first official date in the now empty kitchens. Everyone else has long since finished eating, so the two boyfriends seize the opportunity to steal some snacks and relax in the normally bustling space with only each other as company. Not that they were complaining at all.

This continued for about a week and a half. The new lovers would sneak away from everyone else and their responsibilities to meet in various places to do various things. They would meet in each others rooms to cuddle close to one another and bask in their pure love. They would sneak into the kitchens to feed each other snacks, or into the library and giggle along the way. They would lay under the stars, stealing kisses in the middle of the training field. 

They were happy. Dimitri was happy. Until Byleth was called away for a specific mission. One that needed Byleth for an indefinite period of time. 

"My love, must you go? Can't they send someone, anyone else?" Dimitri said, pleading in his voice. His hands held Byleth's tightly, almost too scared to let go. 

Byleth nodded sadly, squeezing Dimitri's hands to communicate that he isn't liking this any more than his boyfriend. "It has to be me." He muttered before reaching up for a quick kiss, but before he could pull away Dimitri tilted his head slightly to deepen the kiss causing Byleth to gasp silently in surprise. Both smiled softly when they eventually pulled away.

They got lost in the other's eyes for a moment before Dimitri suddenly brightened. "I'll come with you!" He declared. It was the perfect idea. Not only would Dimitri not have to part with his love, he would be able to protect him as well on the dangerous mission.

And yet, Byleth deflated at the statement. And he shook his head. "You can't," he replied simply. "It's confidential. I barely know the details myself." Byleth softened at Dimitri's reaction, raising his hand to caress his cheek. "I'm so sorry." Byleth whispered, trying comfort his boyfriend and hold back tears at the same time.

Dimitri takes a deep breath before quickly grabbing Byleth's cheeks and tilting his head up to kiss his darling a little rougher than he intended. Byleth could feel the warm thin stream of a tear against his cheek, but he could not tell if it was his tear or Dimitri's. 

When they parted lips, Dimitri wiped the tear away with the pad of his thumb, on both Byleth's cheek and his own. He took a deep breath to still his shaking voice. "Be safe, alright?" He asks in a soft voice. 

Byleth nods, not trusting his own voice. "And I'll think of you every moment you're gone," Dimitri adds, his voice cracking on the last word, but they both pretend not to notice because they are too overwhelmed with emotion to care.

Byleth said one simple word, and it broke Dimitri so much that he couldn't respond. He had to turn around and walk away. He walked all the way to his room. He shut the door and his eyes. Tears streamed down and Dimitri crumpled to the floor. And this was the start. 

What was that one simple word, you ask? It was " _Goodbye_ ". 

And so Dimitri was alone. Not really, he had all the other people in his life. And they were concerned, for very good reasons. They knew how much the two boyfriends cared for each other. They knew how _affected_ Dimitri was. 

But everytime they tried to talk to him, he brushed them off with a forced smile and an "I'm fine". So they eventually stopped asking. They didn't see Dimitri very often anymore, if at all, and if they did see him it was only in passing. 

Dimitri could feel himself slipping downward in a spiral, yet he _didn't know what to do_ to stop it. No matter what he did, or didn't do, he couldn't get himself back up to the high he felt with Byleth. He even began to doubt that he would _ever_ reach that point of pure happiness again.

It got to the point of him seeing family that has long been dead. At first he was overjoyed to see his family that he missed so much, he didn't even consider the fact that these people weren't alive anymore and that they shouldn't be here and speaking with him. 

People asked who the hell he was talking too. He didn't realize until then that only he could see his loved ones. And as expected, this caused him much distress. He began to question what was reality and what was just his mind playing cruel tricks on him. 

He never trusted anything that happened anymore, especially not anything positive that occurred. So he stuck to his room, isolating himself so he knows that anyone he speaks too is just a cruel figment of his imagination. I mean, knowing is half the battle, right? 

Dimitri would still talk to his loved ones, even thought he knew they weren't real. He knew he probably shouldn't, but he just missed them so much that he was desperate. He purposely isolated himself from real people as well, so that most definitely didn't help. 

It was after one particular conversation with Glenn, that left Dimitri overwhelmed, exhausted, and upset to the point of tears. This didn't happen very often because he knew it wasn't real. He knew it was just his awful imagination.

"Dimitri," Glenn had said rather coldly, which should have been his first clue that this wouldn't be a good imaginary interaction. 

"Glenn!" Dimitri said in shock, sitting up from where he was laying on his bed. "Geez, it's been forever. About 10 years, right?"

" _9 years since I died._ " Glenn corrected, just as cold as before and a slight accusing tone in his voice. Dimitri physically flinched at the reminder of the gruesome event.

"I, um," Dimitri stuttered, trying to find a different topic to talk about, because he most definitely did not want to remember that. "Wha- what abou-"

"It's _your_ fault, you know." Glenn cut him off sharply. The accusing tone was stronger and now very obvious. 

"I- I tried! There was nothing more I could do!" Dimitri defended himself. But since this was an argument against his own mind, it wasn't likely that he would be successful. 

"Yes, you _tried_ and you _failed!_ And now I am **dead** and it's _**your fault**_ " Glenn's voice rose slightly, and the fight between the two sides gained intensity. 

"I did everything I could!" There was a desperate tone to Dimitri's voice, trying to plead his case. His resolve was weak after the drop in his sanity, mental health, and in his life in general.

"And it still **_wasn't enough_** " Glenn snarled out at him, causing Dimitri to flinch back violently. He slipped from the edge of his bed and fell with a thud on the floor.

"I was a _child_!" Dimitri shouted and sat up on his knees, trying to gain some form of advantage, anything, against the opposition. 

Glenn said nothing. The echo of Dimitri's words bounced back to him. The full weight of the statement settled heavily on the room.

"I couldn't do anything else" Dimitri brought his voice down to a whisper. The sudden silence almost painful as the choas in his mind grew louder with each passing moment. 

Glenn still said nothing. The many voices, sounds, noises, and nonsense in Dimitri's head so loud he couldn't hear much else. 

"I swear-" Dimitri's voice cracked sharply and his voice gave out. He gasped and it sounded like he was in physical pain. Even that was debatable at this point. "I couldn't." He muttered, to himself now, not even believing it.

He clamped his hands over his ears and tightened himself into a tiny ball with his knees pressed up to his chest and his back shoved in the corner of his bed and night stand. He was trying desperately to block out everything and simultaneously push everything out. 

"It still dosen't excuse how **pathetic** you were." Glenn said quietly, the power of the words enough to get his message across.

Dimitri snapped. He has had it with this fake Glenn and his other fake loved ones showing up and hurting him even more. Starting out soft and nice and soon shoving him down deeper into his despair.

" _ **NO**_! **STOP** IT!" Dimitri shouted at the top of his lungs to be heard over the noise and emotion. He clenched his eyes shut blocking out the image of Glenn. 

" _ **YOU AREN'T EVEN REAL!**_ "

And it all stopped. And it was silent, almost too silent. The only sound being His own heavy breathing with a small whimper here and there. Tears slowly started slipping down his cheeks. At the first sob, he pressed his face into his knees to muffle the noise and he cried. He was broken.

Byleth had finished his mission extremely early and he had arrived home not too long before this. The first thing he wanted to do after his debriefing was to go see his boyfriend who he had very much missed, but he wanted it to be a surprise, so he asked that no one tell Dimitri that he was coming. 

When Byleth had reached the door, he had a faint smile on his face and he raised his hand to knock. Then he heard the sobs from inside and his smile fell and his hand drifted to the the door handle. He slowly cracked the door open to see inside. 

The sight he saw broke his slow moving heart. He slowly and silently made his way fully inside and shut the door firmly behind him, because he didn't think that Dimitri would appreciate the whole world seeing him in such a vulnerable state. He hadn't even noticed Byleth come in. He crouched down in front of his boyfriend and spoke softly as not to startle the broken man. 

"My love? I'm here." Byleth practically whispered, gently reaching out his hand to comfort the other. He looked so small, which was odd because normally he appeared tall and intimidating. "I'm _home_."

Dimitri knew that this couldn't be real. That this was just a trick his evil and broken mind was playing on him. But the only people that he saw were very much dead and he knew this. So the only conclusion that Dimitri's dark mind could draw was that Byleth was **dead**. 

Byleth was **dead**. _Byleth_ was **dead** and it was his fault. It was _all his_ fault. He _couldn't_ go with him to _protect_ him. **He wasn't there** when Byleth _needed him_ most. And now he was **_dead_**. And it was _his_ fault. He should have pushed harder to send someone _else_. To send **himself**. It should be **him** that was **_dead_** , not Byleth. Byleth did nothing wrong. _Dimitri_ was the one who _should have died._ And so he voiced this train of thought. 

"Oh god- no, _No!_ Not you too... I'm sorry, God I'm _so sorry_ Love." Dimitri babbled on and on, not making much sense and confusing Byleth. He hadn't even looked up at his boyfriend yet, and that alone concerned Byleth. 

"I'm really sorry, I should have gone with. I should have _been_ there. **My** fault, should have **_saved_** you. Should have been me, _all my **fault**._ I'm sorry I _couldn't_ -" he chokes on a sob and presses his face harder against his knees, muffling the pathetic sound. Apologies and "it should have been me"s kept spilling from his mouth.

Byleth realizes quickly what is happening and changes his actions. "Dimitri, I'm right here. I'm _alive_." He reassured quietly, reaching out to run his hand along his boyfriend's shin to help ground him in reality. 

Dimitri moved his own hand to rest on top of Byleth's and moved it along in time with him. He finally looks up at Byleth and he just stares for a moment. His face shows a rage of emotions in just a few seconds. Disbelief, sadness, relief, shock, and so many more that Byleth couldn't name. The emotion that his face settled on was shocked joy and then he stopped functioning.

Byleth saw this and gently guided him to standing and then coaxed him into laying down on his bed. Byleth pulled away slowly and left Dimitri in bed for a moment, which caused a whimper from Dimitri and he reached out to Byleth's retreating form. 

"It's alright. I'll be right there in a moment Love." Byleth reassured him, squeezing his outstretched hand before slowly letting go. At the loss of grounding contact, Dimitri curled back in on himself. 

Byleth shuffled around the room, grabbing things from various shelves and drawers. Dimitri had no idea what Byleth was getting or doing, but the next thing he knew, the subtle scent of chamomile and lemon was filling the room. A heavy, yet comforting blanket was draped over him and he instantly relaxed and snuggled closer into the soft fabric. The harsh light of the room was dimmed, the only light left being the soft orange glow of a few scattered candles. 

Byleth lifted the side of the blanket and shuffled under it and up against his lover, trying not to disturb the relaxed form. He wrapped his arm over Dimitri's side and began pressing soft kisses to the back of his neck and shoulders. He absentmindedly started humming a quiet tune to help create a grounding sound to follow. 

Dimitri sighed and sunk deeper into Byleth's calming touch. He hadn't felt this content in weeks and he was savoring every second of it. He knew now that this was very real, and that nothing bad could happen as he relaxed in his boyfriends arms. 

Dimitri was slowly lulled to sleep by the soft stimulation and the line between conscious and unconscious blurred, but he was almost entirely sure he felt the words "I Love You" being traced into his back.

**Author's Note:**

> Detailed Trigger Warning:  
> Dimitri has a conversation with Glenn and Glenn blames him for his death. He also assumes Byleth is dead and blames himself.  
> Dimitri isolates himself and doesn't help his mental health.


End file.
